I can't believe me.
I can't believe you.
I'm drowning in my own empty heart,
fearing the future,
fearing the past.
Don't want to talk about it.
It's too complicated anyways.
Too complicated to explain.
Too complicated to shout it out loud.
Don't even know what's my f*ckin' problem,
but it's driving me insane.
I'm losing it,
day by day.
Don't want anyone to see me.
Don't want to see anyone.
Don't want to talk at all.
Don't want to move.
Don't want to feel.
Don't want to feel my life ripping me apart.
Just want to smoke my shit,
blur everything around me out.
Listen to music
and just die in peace.
Not because I really want to be dead.
Just to see who's coming to my funeral.
Well..
The wish to be dead is a reason too.
But I can't.
Because it would drive the few people who love me insane.
So I'm living.
While 'existing' is probably more fitting.
In my own bittersweet insanity that no one besides me can see.
